I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize
