We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
These 23 People Had Coworkers From Hell
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
21 NSFW Facts About Famous Celebrities That Will Blow Your Mind
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.