I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??