I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
