I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
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She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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