we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
