At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Randomize
