If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
