I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
These Are 23 Of The Most Uncomfortable Questions You Can Ask
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
The 17 Most Horrible Things Said To Online Daters
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.