A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
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Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick