i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
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it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
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That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
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