He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
only if we run a train.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Contemplating These 27 Questions Will Make Your Brain Explode
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.