I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
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He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
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Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.