its not stalking. its research.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
