i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
My sheets look like a crime scene.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize
