so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Acid is not a monday night drug
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Randomize
