And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize
