Dude i fell asleep inside of her
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
31 Times Kim Kardashian Showed Her Love For Balmain
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
19 Tricks To Help You Join The Mile High Club
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone