It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it