I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit