When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...