i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
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He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
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I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Let the clothes fall where they may.
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