What did we do last night that was yellow?
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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