party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
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