was it more than 30 minutes?
then you're in a relationship
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.