Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
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