For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
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