She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
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