I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
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