I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
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