I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I think my moral compass just broke
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Randomize