After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
