Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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