if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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