everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
were you high?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.