I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
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She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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