You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I was not drunk enough for that final.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize