There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
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