I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
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