I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
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