I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
