Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
