plz talk dirty to me
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...