Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
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She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
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you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.