fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
The Most Iconic Met Gala Looks The Kardashian’s Have Rocked
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves