This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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