hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
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