Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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