I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Randomize