you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Can you bring me the toilet please
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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