i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.