I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho