I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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