Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Randomize
