i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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