She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Randomize
